Portraits - Neo-Burlesque
1. World Famous BOB
2. Dottie Lux
3. Evil Hate Monkey
4. Ms. Tickle
5. Cheekie Lane
6. Perle Noir
7. Nasty Canaste
8. Little Briiklyn
10. Velocity Chyaldd
Just try and tell me burlesque is all about women trying to look pretty and dainty for men. Go on. Try it. I fucking dare you.
I’m fine with this. If it means said place is complying with the ACA instead of trying to get around it by kicking their employees on to the exchanges via cutting hours to part-time, great. Here’s two dimes.
Twenty cents for a bill of over $20. So that employees get health insurance. This is a fucking ADVERTISEMENT for Obamacare.
I will gladly pay an extra twenty cents if it means employees get healthcare coverage. Gladly.
If you can afford/budget to spend $100 in dinner, surely you can afford/budget that extra dollar so people can get basic healthcare.
THE TWILIGHT OF THE GODS
Gullinkambi is singing to the Aesir, Fjalar is crowing in the Gallows-Wood, and the rust-red cock of Hel screeches into the gloaming. Ragnarok is upon us.
Now Garm howls loud before Gnipahellir,
The fetters will burst, and the wolf run free
Much do I know, and more can see
Of the fate of the gods, the mighty in fight.
From the east comes Hrym with shield held high;
In giant-wrath does the serpent writhe;
O’er the waves he twists, and the tawny eagle
Gnaws corpses screaming; Naglfar is loose.
O’er the sea from the north there sails a ship
With the people of Hel, at the helm stands Loki;
After the wolf do wild men follow,
And with them the brother of Byleist goes.
Surt fares from the south with the scourge of branches,
The sun of the battle-gods shone from his sword;
The crags are sundered, the giant-women sink,
The dead throng Hel-way, and heaven is cloven.
From below the dragon the dark comes forth; it is the end of all things, and the promise of resurrection.
- skeggǫld, skálmǫld
- skildir ro klofnir -
vindǫld, vargǫld -
áðr verǫld steypiz.
Mun engi maðr
We present the Twilight of the Gods, as told by Padraic Colum. May the frenzy of Odin guide your axe.
Live, provided that the world does not end in fire, blood, and darkness, until April 1.
We’ll see you in Valhalla.
Snow fell on the four quarters of the world; icy winds blew from every side; the sun and the moon were hidden by storms. It was the Fimbul Winter: no spring came and no summer; no autumn brought harvest or fruit, and winter grew into winter again.
There was three years’ winter. The first was called the Winter of Winds: storms blew and snows drove down and frosts were mighty. The children of men might hardly keep alive in that dread winter.
The second winter was called the Winter of the Sword: those who were left alive amongst men robbed and slew for what was left to feed on; brother fell on brother and slew him, and over all the world there were mighty battles.
And the third winter was called the Winter of the Wolf.
The scent of utter desolation: three long white winters ushering in the end of the world. Endless rolling landscapes of snow and ice, bereft of bud, flower, or seed.
Then the ancient witch who lived in Jarnvid, the Iron Wood, fed the Wolf Managarm on unburied men and on the corpses of those who fell in battle. Mightily grew and flourished the Wolf that was to be the devourer of Mani, the Moon. The Champions in Valhalla would find their seats splashed with the blood that Managarm dashed from his jaws; this was a sign to the Gods that the time of the last battle was approaching.
The offspring of Fenrir, known in whispers as the Moon-Hound, the Moon-Snatcher, the Enemy, He Who Hates: ironwood needles and blood-matted fur.
A cock crew; far down in the bowels of the earth he was and beside Hela’s habitation: the rusty-red cock of Hel crew, and his crowing made a stir in the lower worlds. In Jötunheim a cock crew, Fialar, the crimson cock, and at his crowing the Giants aroused themselves. High up in Asgard a cock crew, the golden cock Gullinkambir, and at his crowing the Champions in Valhalla bestirred themselves.
Red musk and belladonna blossom for Hel’s red rooster, amber and copal for Gullinkambir, and pimento-soaked red clove for Fialar.
A dog barked; deep down in the earth a dog barked; it was Garm, the hound with bloody mouth, barking in Gnipa’s Cave. The Dwarfs who heard groaned before their doors of stone. The tree Ygdrassil moaned in all its branches. There was a rending noise as the Giants moved their ship; there was a trampling sound as the hosts of Muspelheim gathered their horses.
But Jötunheim and Muspelheim and Hel waited tremblingly; it might be that Fenrir the Wolf might not burst the bonds wherewith the Gods had bound him. Without his being loosed the Gods might not be destroyed. And then was heard the rending of the rock as Fenrir broke loose. For the second time the Hound Garm barked in Gnipa’s Cave.
Doom unfettered, the ruin of hope: the tattered remains of Gelgja, smashed stone, feral grey musk, and blackened blood.
Then was heard the galloping of the horses of the riders of Muspelheim; then was heard the laughter of Loki; then was heard the blowing of Heimdall’s horn; then was heard the opening of Valhalla’s five hundred and forty doors, as eight hundred Champions made ready to pass through each door.
Serpentine green musk with fiery red ginger, sweet basil, alder leaf, white patchouli, cistus, and mistletoe.
Odin took council with Mimir’s head. Up from the waters of the Well of Wisdom he drew it, and by the power of the runes he knew he made the head speak to him. Where best might the Æsir and the Vanir and the Einherjar, who were the Champions of Midgard, meet, and how best might they strive with the forces of Muspelheim and Jötunheim and Hel? The head of Mimir counseled Odin to meet them on Vigard Plain and to wage there such war that the powers of evil would be destroyed forever, even though his own world should be destroyed with them.
Cool, dark water steeped with mugwort, mayweed, and thyme.
The riders of Muspelheim reached Bifröst, the Rainbow Bridge. Now would they storm the City of the Gods and fill it with flame. But Bifröst broke under the weight of the riders of Muspelheim, and they came not to the City of the Gods.
Jörmungand, the serpent that encircles the world, reared itself up from the sea. The waters flooded the lands, and the remnant of the world’s inhabitants was swept away. That mighty flood floated Naglfar, the Ship of Nails that the Giants were so long building, and floated the ship of Hel also. With Hrymer the Giant steering it, Naglfar sailed against the Gods, with all the powers of Jötunheim aboard. And Loki steered the ship of Hel with the Wolf Fenrir upon it for the place of the last battle.
Black oak and sprucewood with opoponax, myrrh, black ambergris, and the silent ice of Niflheimr.
Since Bifröst was broken, the Æsir and the Vanir, the Asyniur and the Vana, the Einherjer and the Valkyries rode downward to Vigard through the waters of Thund. Odin rode at the head of his Champions. His helmet was of gold and in his hand was his spear Gungnir. Thor and Tyr were in his company.
In Mirkvid, the Dark Forest, the Vanir stood against the host of Muspelheim. From the broken end of the Rainbow Bridge the riders came, all flashing and flaming, with fire before them and after them. Niörd was there with Skadi, his Giant wife, fierce in her war-dress; Freya was there also, and Frey had Gerda beside him as a battle-maiden. Terribly bright flashed Surtur’s sword. No sword ever owned was as bright as his except the sword that Frey had given to Skirnir. Frey and Surtur fought; he perished, Frey perished in that battle, but he would not have perished if he had had in his hand his own magic sword.
Iron and fire: red-hot ginger, fossilized amber, prickly poppy, red cedar, cubeb, star anise, and scorpion pepper.
And now, for the third time, Garm, the hound with blood upon his jaws, barked. He had broken loose on the world, and with fierce bounds he rushed toward Vigard Plain, where the Gods had assembled their powers. Loud barked Garm. The Eagle Hræsvelgur screamed on the edge of heaven. Then the skies were cloven, and the tree Ygdrassil was shaken in all its roots.
To the place where the Gods had drawn up their ranks came the ship of Jötunheim and the ship of Hel, came the riders of Muspelheim, and Garm, the hound with blood upon his jaws. And out of the sea that now surrounded the plain of Vigard the serpent Jörmungand came.
What said Odin to the Gods and to the Champions who surrounded him? “We will give our lives and let our world be destroyed, but we will battle so that these evil powers will not live after us.” Out of Hel’s ship sprang Fenrir the Wolf. His mouth gaped; his lower jaw hung against the earth, and his upper jaw scraped the sky. Against the Wolf Odin All-Father fought. Thor might not aid him, for Thor had now to encounter Jörmungand, the monstrous serpent.
By Fenrir the Wolf Odin was slain. But the younger Gods were now advancing to the battle; and Vidar, the Silent God, came face to face with Fenrir. He laid his foot on the Wolf’s lower jaw, that foot that had on the sandal made of all the scraps of leather that shoemakers had laid by for him, and with his hands he seized the upper jaw and tore his gullet. Thus died Fenrir, the fiercest of all the enemies of the Gods.
Jörmungand, the monstrous serpent, would have overwhelmed all with the venom he was ready to pour forth. But Thor sprang forward and crushed him with a stroke of his hammer Miölnir. Then Thor stepped back nine paces. But the serpent blew his venom over him, and blinded and choked and burnt, Thor, the World’s Defender, perished.
Loki sprang from his ship and strove with Heimdall, the Warder of the Rainbow Bridge and the Watcher for the Gods. Loki slew Heimdall and was slain by him.
Bravely fought Tyr, the God who had sacrificed his swordhand for the binding of the Wolf. Bravely he fought, and many of the powers of evil perished by his strong left hand. But Garm, the hound with bloody jaws, slew Tyr.
And now the riders of Muspelheim came down on the field. Bright and gleaming were all their weapons. Before them and behind them went wasting fires. Surtur cast fire upon the earth; the tree Ygdrassil took fire and burned in all its great branches; the World Tree was wasted in the blaze. But the fearful fire that Surtur brought on the earth destroyed him and all his host.
The blood of the gods cascading onto earth and into sea: salt and sinew, venom and flame, and bone shards scattered across the gore-soaked soil of Óskópnir.
The Wolf Hati caught up on Sol, the Sun; the Wolf Managarm seized on Mani, the Moon; they devoured them; stars fell, and darkness came down on the world.
The sun turns black, earth sinks in the sea: black amber and shimmering moonflower blackened by opoponax, khus attar, smoked oudh, and myrrh and all swallowed by the fathomless depths of a lightless ocean.
Please share this for a chance to win a copy of Wish You Were Here: Adventures in Cemetery Travel
About the book:
Come along as I explore 50 graveyards in 35 essays, illustrated with photographs from my travels. Many of the essays originally appeared in Gothic.Net, Morbid Outlook, Travelers’ Tales: Paris, and Morbid Curiosity magazine. Wish You Were Here: Adventures in Cemetery Travel is available from Amazon.
The book trailer is here: https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=O6x1FBeQP80
On Valentine’s Day, I’ll pick one lucky winner from those who reblog this to win a copy of Wish You Were Here. You can have your choice of paperback or Kindle version.
Thanks for your help getting the word out!
I believe this is an appropriate moment on tumblr to ask, “What is air?”
Air is the name given to the atmosphere used in breathing and photosynthesis. Dry air contains roughly (by volume) 78.09% nitrogen, 20.95% oxygen, 0.93% argon, 0.039% carbon dioxide, and small amounts of other gases. Air also contains a variable amount of water vapor, on average around 1%. While air content andatmospheric pressure vary at different layers, air suitable for the survival of terrestrial plants and terrestrial animals is currently only known to be found in Earth’s troposphere and artificial atmospheres.
Air is a music duo from Versailles, France, consisting of Nicolas Godin and Jean-Benoît Dunckel. The name Air is derived from the backronym Amour, Imagination, Rêve which translates to Love, Imagination, Dream.
Thanks, guys. That was really helpful. Now that I know what is air, I will endeavor to regain my ability to even.
Tom is probably Kermit the Frogs biggest fan, and I think it’s freaken adorable.
I “dawwwwww!“‘d out loud.
ok. that is adorbs. All the people I went to theater conservatory with(and the staff for that matter) were so fucking intent on making High Art that they’d NEVER have had a moment like this.
I was lucky enough to get Coriolanus tickets in the mad scramble yesterday. I live and work in London and the Donmar Warehouse is not far from my work, so today I walked there after I left the office and picked up my tickets!
It was interesting to see that they printed the time they were purchased on my ticket - 9.11am yesterday. Around 10 minutes later, all the tickets were sadly gone. It’s a tiny theatre though, and these tickets were always going to be in high demand.
After picking up my tickets, I had a wander round - I know the area pretty well but have never been to this particular theatre before.
Firstly, the theatre is very small and is nested in between shops, actually backing onto a small boutique shopping centre. The foyer area and box office is tiny - you could fit about 20 people in there before it would be full up. And the surrounding streets themselves are old, narrow and cobbled. In short, I don’t think staff or security are going to allow large groups of people to congregate at any time - that would just block the road.
Secondly, there is not really a designated ‘stage door’. There is a back door to the theatre, but it is not marked as a stage door and more importantly - it is a fire exit, so it must be kept clear at all times. Again, I don’t think security would allow groups of people to just hang around waiting.
This is the back of the theatre - as you can see, it’s a small road and there isn’t the space to handle large numbers of people.
Performers have been known to exit via this rear door, but they have also been known to go out the main front door or sign autographs in the foyer (both Karen Gillan and Gillian Anderson did this). Bear in mind though - the foyer is TINY. And the staff simply would not let huge numbers of people wait there for security reasons (and for the safety of the cast). It’s likely that cast may vary which exit they come out of from night to night. And who knows? There may be another ‘secret’ exit for when they really just want to get home.
Thirdly, for the big (i.e movie) stars - any ‘stage door’ interaction will be managed by security - for safety more than anything else. Large numbers of people all jostling for position is a hazard and they are not going to put the actors at risk if people get pushy.
Benedict Cumberbatch did a theatre thing last year in central London and got absolutely mobbed when he went out to sign a few things. I understand he was quite annoyed to have been pretty much physically backed into a corner against the wall by the fans. This is a picture from the Cumberbatchweb site:
A friend of mine also went to see Tom last year when he did Stories before Bedtime at the Criterion theatre in central London. If you’ve ever wondered why you don’t see more pictures of him with fans from that night, it’s because he got ‘absolutely mobbed’ by fans when he came out the stage door. This is the only photo I know of from that night - my friend says there were just too many people to allow for personal photos. And this was February 2012 - BEFORE the Avengers came out, or the Hollow Crown. Back to the days when not many people knew who he was and he had under 50,000 followers on Twitter. And he *still* got mobbed.
Check out this photo of Jude Law at the Donmar Warehouse stage (back) door when he did Hamlet - note the barriers. So in this case, it’s very much like waiting on the red carpet - if you’re at the front, you’ll likely get your thing signed, but the chances of a posed photo of yourself with the star is slim - there just isn’t the time or space.
I don’t know if they’ll have barriers up every night for Tom, but yesterday’s chaotic sales and the whole thing selling out in 20 minutes will have given the Donmar the warning they need to prepare adequate security for the cast.
Why have I posted this? Because if I know anything from my experience, it’s that building something up in your head about how a situation or event is going to ‘be’ and it’s going to happen a certain way, usually leads to disappointment. Reality is rarely how you imagine it to be, and I think fans who imagine they’re going to be having nice long chats with Tom and taking their time posing for photos are going to end up disappointed. Enjoy his performance on stage and be grateful if you do manage to meet him afterwards and get an autograph.
I’m not telling anyone how to behave here - but I have lived in London for many years, I’ve done a lot of plays and stage doors and I cannot emphasise enough how important it is not to ‘expect’ something. Worth remembering that the stage door is not part of their job - once they have performed for you on stage, they have done their work for the day. Many actors (and especially Tom) will of course sign autographs for fans afterwards, but they are in no way obliged to do this. Anything they give you after the show has ended is a bonus. Respect that.